THE BIG PUSH

The “lurgy” that was lingering took a turn for the worse yesterday – it was time to hit back.

I adopt an approach to the fight against illness that owes a lot to British military strategy during the Great War. Yup, it’s a war of attrition between me and the virus.

The standard procedure owes a lot to the methods used in the Somme. So yesterday saw a continual barrage of the big guns as I relentlessly pounded the virus with everything in my arsenal in an effort to soften it up prior to today’s “big push”.

Benylin “mucus” syrup was quaffed from the bottle (measuring spoons are for girls), Vicks synex was snorted, Lemsip was …well. “sipped” and brufen was necked. Can’t say if it was shell shock from the barrage or, more likely, simply O.D.ing  on cold remedies but at one point yesterday I did get a wee bit disorientated and confused and found myself sleeping at my post.

Anyway, the barrage went on through the evening into the night and the early hours of the morning.

Then today, sometime before sunrise the barrage stopped and I “went over the top”. Seven miles hard….advance towards the enemy. Death or glory!

Lets get the old heart rate up, the blood pumping and a bit of a sweat on…. Its me or the virus.

Seemed to go OK(ish) The old heart rate was up a bit but that might just be the drugs. And a bit like the old Vickers machine guns of old the run was accompanied by the constant “rat-tat-tat” of gallons of phlegm being expectorated along the water of Leith pathway (narrowly missing a passing cyclist at one point – should have had a light on!!).

Don’t know if I fully eradicated the virus, but I at least expect it to petition for an armistice any day now.

 

 

Got a bit of a row from Anne for going into work full of the cold. “Think about your colleagues”.

I reminded her that I don’t have “colleagues” I work beside Civil Servants. If I had anthrax or smallpox I’d be at work trying to spread it.