LEAST SAID ABOUT NUMBER 4 THE BETTER

I was at the dentist today. Never my favourite place to be, and I'm always looking for an excuse not to go.
So. While I was in the waiting room I noticed on of those "have you got swine flu?" posters.
It listed a whole load of symptoms and suggested that if you had two or more of the symptoms then you just might have Swine Flu. So kindly piss off because the dentist doesn't want you on his premises, never mind have to delve about your manky mouth.
I scanned the symptoms....

1. "Runny Nose" ... well. I'd just come into a hot waiting room after cycling six miles in Baltic cold conditions.
2. "Aching limbs"... Aching limbs? I'm a runner, that's a normal condition for me. I can't remember the last time I didn't have aching limbs!
3. "Fatigue" .... Again, being a runner a certain amount of tiredness is the norm. Then again getting up just after 5 every morning doesn't help.
4. "Vomiting or diarrhea" ... well I did get caught short that time I was out a really long run but that was ages back...

Still. I had three and I only needed two! Ya beezer a last minute reprieve from the dentist chair.
Sadly, just as I was about to report my swine flueyness to the receptionist and leave I was called in. But I shall remeber this for the next time.

Oh. And I might forget to tell them I've had the swine flu jab.